and so it begins... Lakai is a kindergartener.

This morning Lleyton woke up extra early, sobbing in his crib. As I went to grab him, I saw Lakai strolling out of his room with groggy eyes. He came right over with a smile on his face and said, "It's okay buddy," and gave him a little smooch. Then we all went and cuddled up daddy in bed. If that wasn't Heaven on Earth then I don't know what is.

Fast forward a couple hours and Lakai is sitting at the table, shoveling pancakes in his mouth to make sure he doesn't miss the bus (which doesn't happen to leave for another 45 minutes). He woke up with so much enthusiasm. I woke up dreading this day.

Lakai is in Kindergarten. Is this real life. How did this happen so quickly? It was just yesterday that I was trying to soak up every once of his swollen, fresh little face at the hospital. I felt so ready for him to go, up until early this morning. I feel like this is the first step towards independence and I just don't feel ready for it. I know he will be okay. I know he will have friends aplenty. I know he will run into my arms and tell me all about his day. I know he will thirst to learn and go to school with an eager heart.

But I also know kids can sometimes be cruel and he will have a hurt heart. I know the bubble we have him in will slowly shrink and he will be exposed to some of the negativity in the world. I know school may not come easy and learning may be hard. I'm just praying that God will guide Ryan and I as we embark on this new adventure.

Lakai,

Please never forget how smart and kind you are. Keep a hunger for knowledge and embrace everyone around you. Remember we are always thinking of you when you are scared and that we will always be waiting for you with open arms, ready to hear all about your daily adventure. Above all, never forget how loved you are and how much support you have in daddy and me. We love you all around the earth, up to the sky, as many trees as there are planted and as many super heroes as you can imagine.

Momma

do i really have to share?

Lakai starts back to preschool next week and it is a little bittersweet. The past few months I've been able to relish in him...

7:30 am Lakai sneaks down the stairs, ninja style, like a snake (umm, yes these are two different things, I know). I hear a little giggle and go running to the bottom of the stairs to greet his sweet smile. He jumps into my arms and we sit, ever so still, for just a moment so I can breathe him in.

7:40 am We discuss what to make for breakfast. Correction, Lakai states he wants pancakes for breakfast. I try to sell him on something else. I make pancakes.

8:20 am Lakai and Chubby hop in the bath. Lakai fills a bath boat with water and pours it on Chubby's belly while saying, "mmmm, maple syrup." Clearly he loves pancakes. I suds the boys up, Lakai tried to convince me his hair does not need washing and I convince him that I can only do silly hair-dos with bubbles. It works. He is clean. Lakai will play in the bath until he appears to be a 90 year old man. We giggle about how wrinkly his hands and feet are.

9:10 am Lakai picks up a toy from his room, brings it into our room, plays with it for 37 seconds, sets it down on our floor and repeats at least 25 times. I fold laundry.

The next fews hours are filled with play dates, running errands, working, napping, and just about whatever else we can fit in. Oh, and sometimes this is when I attempt to get ready for the day.

3:00 pm Lakai throws a fit because he didn't want lunch, but now he wants a, "yittle treat." I say not until he eats something good that will help him be strong like daddy. He cries and says his belly isn't telling him he is hungry for something healthy. We repeat the conversation three times. At this point in the day I know he is tired.

3:15 pm I find a reason to get in the car and drive in hopes he will fall asleep. My attempt fails.

5:00 pm I call Ryan and ask when he is going to be home.

5:30 pm Ryan walks in the door and I lay on the floor of the living room exhausted.

6:30 pm We eat dinner. We try to convince our picky eater that veggies will turn him into a super hero. He is too smart and our attempt fails. We succeed in getting Lakai to eat his chicken.

7:00 pm Lakai starts to wind down and becomes cuddly. This is one of my favorite parts of the day. It makes the bumps in our day fade away.

Somewhere between 8:30 and, ummm later than I want to admit (we are on summer sleep schedule which has resulted in a horrible lack of an actual bedtime). Lakai snuggles with us in our bed. During the day Ryan and I say he will be moved to his room, but we just can't help it. We love his warm little body near us. He won't be "yittle" for long and I can't bare watching him get so big so fast.Chubby is on my right, snuggled into my chest and Lakai is on my left, breathing ever so softly onto my arm. Ry snuggles in and I feel full and ready to repeat the next day.

I'm going to miss him while he learns and grows, but I know this is what he needs and he will astonish us with his smarts. Last year he loved seeing his friends and telling me stories from the day. I can't wait for that to be added back into our schedule. I cherish that in this moment he loves talking to me and asking questions. I know that there will be a day when this isn't so. I know there will be a day when I ask him how school was and he will say, "good." and then I'll ask what he learned and he will say, "I can't remember." and a little piece of my heart will break. It will only be temporary I know, but right now I'm going to soak him all up. I'm going to savor this last week before I have to start sharing him again.

the boy in denial.

Lakai is in denial... plain and simple.

A few days ago I asked Ryan to pull the bins of Lakai's old clothes from out of the garage. He's such a champ and I didn't even have to ask twice. Now that's a good man right there. Well, Lakai and I decided to sort through the bins last night and this is what happened...

Those swim trunks are a size six months. He is in denial of how big he actually is. As soon as he saw the trucks I couldn't get his hands off them. He HAD to put them on. The funny thing is, my three year old did it... he got them on. It was a tight squeeze, but he did it. I could not convince him to take them off though and by the end of the night he decided maybe those small shorts weren't his brightest idea. He had red undie indentations on his scrawny little hips.

He was quite the helper though and I think he even got excited that if he has a baby brother, his little bro will get to wear some of his old clothes. It was nice spending that time talking to him and explaining that he used to be itty bitty. We held up some of his old clothes to him (like the outfit we planned on taking him home in until he pooed in it) and my heart melted. I still can't believe how big Lakai has gotten, or that in a few short months we will have another itty bitty.

We find out Friday whether Lakai will have a little sister or little brother and the anticipation is just about killing me. I've have two dreams about the sex. In one we were having a boy and in the other we were having a girl. Basically I still have not an inkling as to what we are having, although Ryan is royally convinced he'll have a princess (I'm not so sure about that).

So for now, we will keep waiting. Be looking here on Friday for the official word :)

little fish.

Lakai started swimming lessons yesterday and loved it. We couldn't get our little fish out of the pool! He did pretty well, but we definitely need to work on his listening skills. He is the youngest one in class, and quite the distraction.

lakai's birthday questionnaire

So, beginning this year I want to ask Lakai the same 20 questions on his birthday. I saw this idea on Pinterest and loved it. We had so much fun giggling about his responses this morning. He is such a ham!

1. What is your favorite color? Green

2. What is your favorite toy? Cars

3. What is your favorite fruit? Strawberries

4. What is your favorite tv show? Jake and the Neverland Pirates

5. What is your favorite thing to eat for lunch? Strawberries

6. What is your favorite outfit? “My fireman costume”

7. What is your favorite game? Cars

8. What is your favorite snack? Strawberries

9. What is your favorite animal? “Let me think. Yes, yes... I like Dinosaurs.”

10. What is your favorite song? The Rio Song 

11. What is your favorite book? I Can Read With My Eyes Shut

12. Who is your best friend? Kinley

13. What is your favorite cereal? Chocolate Cheerios

14. What is your favorite thing to do outside? Run

15. What is your favorite drink? Coffee... This being said, we do not give you coffee Lakai! You do love hot cocoa though!

16. What is your favorite holiday? Christmas

17. What do you like to take to bed with you at night? "Blankie, cars and my bear and my puppy."

18. What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? Pancakes

19. What do you want for dinner on your birthday? "No Thank You"

20. What do you want to be when you grow up? “Ummmm…Pancakes”

Lakai, you are so silly and bring so much life to our home! Happy birthday sweet boy! We love you!

we are makin' a pizza pie.

Lakai and I made pizza pie for daddy the other night :) Lakai loved putting all the toppings on!

I think Lakai liked eating the topping, more than putting them on his pizza pie!

soccer disasters and improvements.

I have put off writing this post because soccer class has made Ryan and I feel like terrible, ill-equipped parents.

Three weeks ago, Ryan and I signed Lakai up for a parent-child indoor soccer class. We both were ecstatic and excited for Lakai to be in his very first organized sport. Lakai seemed enthusiastic too! He couldn't wait to bring his soccer ball onto the field and kick it around.

On the first day of class, Lakai ran out onto the field and immediately began jumping, kicking and giggling with daddy. All was going well until the coach asked for all the kids to come sit in a circle for stretching. Lakai decided to go pout by a wall, and each time Ryan and I tried to approach him, he would grumpily say, "I'm fine mommy, leave me alone." Ryan decided to try and capture some pictures of Mr. Pouty Pants, but when Lakai realized this, he can running at Ryan, full force, arms swinging. He was a savage. Completely unruly. I had to take him off the field twice, and sit with him until he calmed down. All the other children appeared to be on their best behavior and looked like they were having so much fun. Ryan and I were trying to keep our spirits high and just laugh it off, but it was an epic fail.

The second week didn't go much better. To make matters worse, Ryan had to work and I was left to weather the storm alone. Lakai had no interest in listening or participating in the activities. I left wondering if we should drop the class. I started reviewing every possible reason for his bad behavior... Was he hungry? Was he sleepy? Did he feel uncomfortable around the other kids? Should Ryan and I rule out all sport participation in the future? Should we take him to therapy? Was his sick? Does he have a behavior disorder? Am I a terrible parent? Have we babied him too much? Is he too spoiled? With sports off the table, should we try and get him a head start in education so we can rely on an academic scholarship? The reviewing of possibilities was exhausting.

We decided to continue the class, and this past Saturday, Ryan and I were blown away by Lakai's behavior. He did a complete 180. He was an amazing listener. He participated in all the games. He still felt uncomfortable during stretching, but sat next to us. He and daddy ran, jumped, passed the ball, laughed and smiled! Watching Ryan and Lakai warmed my heart.

I'm so glad we didn't drop the class. I've come to the conclusion that Lakai just needed to adjust to a different schedule. Best of all... by not being so caught up in Lakai's behavior, I noticed a few of the other children misbehaving :)

wiggle worm.

Lakai is a wiggle worm... plain and simple. He loves to run and jump and skip and fall and crash. Doesn't matter, so long as he is moving. So needless to say, haircuts are horrible. It means sitting in a chair for an extended period of time. It means my mom spending roughly thirty minutes trying to give Lakai a trim job, while I bribe him with candy and movies, which only makes him want to move more. Its a vicious cycle. That was until we heard about Lil' Snippers. This place is hair-cutting crack for children. The kids get to chose a car (which is powered and its wheels spin) and their favorite Disney movie to watch on a mounted screen in front of them. The whole place was filled with toys and bright colors! It is freaking awesome! My friend Tori and I took the kids here yesterday and Lakai sat through a haircut like a gem! It was great! And the best part... he doesn't have a mullet anymore! Whoop, whoop!

 Lakai also likes to pick out his clothes these days! This was my favorite... Nike short, a Vancouver B.C. shirt and his fuzzy slippers. This is what he picked out for soccer practice. Good grief.